Yo! Bring Out Your Inner Editor (aka More Text From the Work-In-Progress)

I had fun with the first round, so here ya go: more bite-sized text to edit. Click on the link and you'll get a piece of text from the draft of my new manuscript. This is from what I expect will be chapter three. Thank you in advance!

Oh: to answer a question posed in the comments section of the first entry on this subject: Yes, legally, this is okay. I'm only posting small chunks of a draft, which is akin to what I'd do if I were in a writer's group and posted my draft for critique from group members. So feel free; the editing/copyright police won't come get you.